


Silence of the Words

by Fjeril



Series: Fjeril Fictober 2018 [17]
Category: Ensemble Stars! (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Female Pronouns for Narukami Arashi, Fluff, Pre-Canon, Self-Loathing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-17
Updated: 2018-10-17
Packaged: 2019-08-03 12:04:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,021
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16325897
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fjeril/pseuds/Fjeril
Summary: Naru just wants to talk with Mika, nothing more. Nothing more...?





	Silence of the Words

**Author's Note:**

> Fictober day 17: “I’ll tell you but you’re not gonna like it.” is my longest work of the month!  
> And! It is! Fluffy!!!!  
> At least Eydol says so so I guess it's fluffier than usual. She's my fluff-o-meter (and has been on "STOP KILLING PEOPLE" for the last sixteen days) . Also ALL THE THANKS IN THE WORLD @EYDOL BECAUSE YOU HAVE TO STAND MY FICS DAILY and also for bearing with my shit irl these days oops I'm sorry I really really love you ♥  
> EHM.  
> Please enjoy ♥

"Mika, where are you go..."

She hadn't finished her sentence that the boy had already disappeared in the corridors of the school, without a word. It always was the same after classes, he rushed away and disappeared, without a word. Not that he talked a lot in the first place, to be honest. But Narukami Arashi just wanted to know more about that boy that always hid his left eye, except for lives. She wanted to be sure he ate enough and had a proper rest, because he looked constantly tired, pale, and sad. It almost was a miracle that he had managed to enter such a school, and that he was still here.

She had seen his unit's perfomances a few times, and couldn't deny they surpassed many of the other ones in the school. Chess was too huge and too difficult to manage, Ryuseitai was a complete mess most members had joined because they took advantage of its "Justice allies!" image to do litteraly anything under the pretext it was for the greater good. Only one or two members were actually serious about that unit, and she only knew one of themfor they shared the same club. And she didn't want to think about the other units, it was too much of a disaster. She hadn't chosen to enter one yet, because she felt like she couldn't be herself in any of those, and would have to keep the mask she wore for classes, the one people called "he" or "a handsome man".

So, that day, she decided she absolutely wanted to find him, to spend time with him and learn more and... _Oh,_ she noticed, _Am I...?_

She was pretty certain she _already_ had a crush, and that it was on her teacher - her senior as a model and a former idol. Yet again, thinking about knowing more about Mika made her heart jump and she felt happy just getting to spend time by his sides. She _did_ find him handsome, especially in his Valkyrie costume and... _Oh._

Naru could feel herself blush in the middle of the corridor, and had to hide her face. She looked for a place to hide, and decided to take refuge in the toilets. It smelt like cold smoke and other things she didn't want to think about, but at least nobody would try and ask her questions she didn't want to answer. It already was a miracle that she had survived so far, and that she had managed keeping her mask.

She couldn't take it off at home unless she was in her room, door closed, and had wished goodnight to her family and their staff. She could only take it off for the night, when she changed into the night gown she had saved from her mother's monthly cloth-ridding. It was of a beautiful, silky blue that shone under the light, so short it showed most of her thighs and just barely covered enough of her butt - only the front part made her sad, but she couldn't do anything about it for now.

Right now, she wished she could change into that night gown and go to bed for good, to feel like herself and have a good night of rest where she could forget about how she now had a crush on her teacher _and_ on one of her classmates. _I really hope I won't have one on any other student because it's going to be unbearable, at some point..._

After a sigh, she closed her eyes, trying, but failing, not to think too much about her failing to find Mika that day too. It took her a while to actually calm down, after too much time shaking from the fear of being discovered, and way too many tears rolling down her face.

Narukami Arashi had never felt like such a disaster in her whole life.

When she finally felt the strength to open the door and leave the school, very few light had been left on; the sky outside was as dark as could be, for that night was one without a moon. At that point, it didn't matter for her. She'd just walk back home if she had missed the last train, and that was it. Right? Right.

Or maybe not right, she thought, noticing one room had its door slightly open, and there was light inside. Was it an invitation to her dreams or just hiding a scene she didn't want to see? There was music, for sure, but it could be used to cover noises, and she didn't trust many students, in that school.

Her heart stopped for a second, though, when she heard a voice singing. She knew that voice, that song by heart. Thus, taking a look wouldn't be too risky, would it? After a few seonds of pondering Naru decided that whatever this door hid, she'd discover it. But as soon as she put her hand on the handle, someone opened it from the other side, making her forget everything she had tried to persuade herself of that very day.

"Ah, Naru," the person immediately greeted.

Immediately, the said Naru felt like she was going to melt right there. Okay, maybe her crush wasn't just a little one. Maybe she liked him a lot more than she would admit. Just maybe.

"Mika, ah, uhm, I, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to..."

She didn't mean what exactly, she didn't know. And Mika didn't seem to know either, looking all lost and adorable, his hair messy and, for once, his left eye apparent. _I need to leave the school very, very quickly, now._

"Anyway, I'm going home, so, uhm, if you're going to, maybe we could, uhm, walk back home together?"

_What the fuck, brain._

She hadn't meant to invite him to walk home together, especially considering what a mess her brain felt like, that night, but apparently, her mouth was faster than her mind, and before she even had the time to find a way to correct herself, Mika had already nodded.

"Mh, why not. Migh' be less dangerous for me, maybe.

\- Less dangerous...?" she inquired, but his response was to look away, blush, and nod.

"Can you jus'... Not talk about it with the others? That I was trainin' until late I mean."

Naru couldn't help but smile, and nodded in turn:

"I promise. This'll be our little secret."

The red on her classmate's cheeks grew wider, and on hers too, she noticed, as Mika's cuteness reached dangerous levels for her. _Calm down, Naru, calm down._

"Say," Mika started after they had walked out of the building - a rare move coming from him, considering he seemed to avoid all contact, "Ya wanted to tell me somethin', earlier, didn' you?"

_Ah._

She could feel her heart jump in all directions in her chest, and everything that had gone through her mind earlier in the day came back to her face. So, she rubbed her arms to chase the feeling away, and looked down.

"I... Just wanted to spend time with you. It might sound stupid but seeing you all shy in class, you look like a stray kitten to me - I mean that in a good way, I love cats, I even adopted a stray kitten and... Anyway," she interrupted herself, "I just wanted to try and talk with you."

Mika suddenly stopped walking. He probably found her weird, or wanted to flee, or disliked human relationships and would asked to change classes, or _worse_ , go to another school in his home region, and...

"Ah," he simply replied, "Really?"

Naru blinked a few times, unsure if she was supposed to be happy or heartbroken.

"Huh, why, yes, I mean," she babbled, trying to formulate a coherent sentence.

"I'd... Be happy about it. For some reason, I feel better around ya than around the other guys," Mika admitted, his adorable face as red as a rose.

"Do you?

\- Yeah, it's like... Y'er different from 'em all," Mika tried to explain. "How do ya do that?"

Naru's heart was hit by an arrow. A cold one. Of course, she was different. She had always been different. And the one time she had admitted it to one person, they had abandonned her. And the world. That wasn't what she wanted for Mika, not when he seemed to have a life hard enough already.

"It's... My secret," she whispered, a bit more coldly than she wanted to.

"Yer secret...?"

She smiled dryly, before giving her hand to Mika, to signal him she wanted to resume walking home. Talking about her secret, when it was the first time they actually talked together, felt a little too much. He'd run away.

Fortunately, Mika didn't ask any more question, and resumed walking back with her, until the point their ways separated. In the coldness of the night, Naru turned towards her classmate, smiling more tenderly to him - and wishing he was too blunt to notice her feelings.

"Thank you for walking home with me," she said, ready to leave.

But before she could turn back, a hand hastily took hers.

"Naru, wait."

Mika seemed a bit uneasy, and the red color of his face probably wasn't just due to the cold. Or maybe she just hoped a little bit too much. In any case, he didn't look like he wanted to part ways yet.

"Thank ya for invitin' me to walk with you... And I need to tell you a secret."

His odd eyes looked directly into hers, directly into her heart. She could only nod, ready to listen to whatever he had to say.

"I can't feel pain, so walkin' home alone is dangerous fer me. I was goin' to stay at school all nigh', but... Thanks for walkin' with me."

He looked all shy, and so cute Naru thought her heart would explode. At least, for once, she'd end the day smiling - maybe, if she managed to forget how worrying the information that had been admitted to her was.

"You can't feel pain...?"

The boy quickly nodded, but his gaze told her he didn't want to say more about it for now. It probably had taken him a lot to actually voice it - so she decided to make a step, too.

"Alright. Do you want to know my secret?"

Mika opened his mouth, closed it, opened it again. In vain. In the end, he only slightly nodded. _Am I making a mistake...? I'm probably going to fast, ain't I?_ She bit her lower lip, unsure, her heartbeat irregular. But that night, she needed to talk about it. That night, she felt the need to say the thing that had been on her heart for too long.

"I'll tell you, but you're not gonna like it," she stated, preferring him to be ready.

"Unless ya killed someone I'm not scared," the odd-eyed boy whispered, not really sounding as convinced as he wanted to.

It made her smile anyway, for he was obviously doing efforts to socialize with her. He also sounded a lot more natural than when he was interrogated in class, and less shyer than with any of their classmates. Thus, in the silence of the night, she found the strength in her to tell him she really was, to tell him about the mask that was killing her since she was a child.

And in return, Mika listened, accepting each one of her words, each one of her sufferings, even telling her he was glad she had found the strength to say it aloud. The stars were the only witnesses of the hug they shared, of the words they exchanged, of the beginning of a relationship she wouldn't have ever hoped for in her life.

Looking back to those days always made her smile, now that she could barely walk and that her memory was failing her more and more. She would forever be glad for the world to have put Mika in her life; even now, she felt her heart jump in happiness when she looked at him, all wrinkled and almost blind that he was.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!! I had a hard time starting this one because what the fuck would that thing have to be so it both fit me and the sentence. Also lack of sleep + 6hrs of classes makes no good Fjorl  
> I'm not 100% accurate on the previous year units (I thought of this work as pre-war) so don't hesitate and notify me of any error I could have made about it!!  
> I really really hope you enjoyed it, and pray for my shit not to come back tmr (it'll arrive late anyway, very very late)


End file.
